nicked this from the blue order forum, lol even if you know f*ck all abt that dont apply JohnPaul/Michael/Sean/Patrick/Brendan/Finbar/Dermott* *Please delete any Please Complete Surname (last name): O.* celtic fans you will find some of it funny so read thru it... Age (mental not unsure):
Sex (Guess if list 3 suspects) . Fathers Name :- (If unknown physical): 4. Nationality  Irish  Scots/Irish place of residence? Which best describes your Eastern  A Pish Soaked Doorway.
At Her Majestys Pleasure  The Great  Not British  2 rent free Coonsil Hooses knocked into 1 at have you spawned? How many illegitimate little scumbags Never hud ma hole  10+ 20+ Canne Count tax payers expense to accommodate your parasitic brood.
 Never Been Employed  Unemployable  your personality? How would you describe Twisted  Poisonous  Absent  Bitter  Twisted  Bitter & Employed crowbar tae screw the chemists Can you count to ten with your fly up?  Yes  No.
Can you count to 21 with your  Yes  No Can you count at all? shoes on?  Yes  No  Minus Figures  0-10  10-20  (tick at least three) Do you have any distinguishing features? complexion  Big joined up ginger freckles.
 Thick wirey ginger hair  Deathly pale Your shoe size  Room Temperature  Buck Teeth  Big Juggy Lugs  Greasy Black your forehead  Bandy legs  A Hump  Facial scarring  One thick eyebrow stretching across length  Needle marks on arms  Tattoo  Amusingly shaped cranium  Arms & legs of equal Hair  Dark Sunken Eyes  Clapped in jaws.
 Sellick Crest  Irish Tricolour  Shamrock of the following? Do you suffer from any Acne  Warts  STDs  Mysterious Voices  Body Odour  Halitosis  Smelly feet   Henrik Larsson  Your broo number How do you spend community complex  Paranoid persecution complex.
 Sports Complex  Care in the This question is too complex  Deep rooted guilt complex  your leisure time? How often do you  When it rains  Whats a bath?  Monthly  Birthdays  Christmas  Leap Years Yes/No* *Please delete as appropriate.
20 Do you still batter your wife? have a bath? Has your priest ever touched to question 21 *If NO please go Cabbage  Potatoes  Dugshite  Irish Stew  Potatoes  you down there? Yes/No*
 Communion Wafers  Potatoes  Buckfast  Guinness/Bucky Snakebite  Bushmills  Murphys  Guinness  Father OFlaherys Salty Penance Paste  Meths  Furniture Polish  Communion Wine  Fish (Fridays Only)  Fields of Athenrye  Gypsies, Tramps & of records  Daily Record.
 Ma criminal record  Guinness book those that dont apply,if any) What are your hobbies/pastimes? (please tick Theives  Duelling banjos theme from Deliverence  Squeezin ma plooks  Exposing myself   Tannin motors  Mugging  Shoplifting  Sexually assaulting my kids  Tannin hooses in my sink  Urinating in my troosers.
 Collecting rare & contagious skin disorders  Urinating Masturbation (even though I burn in hell)  Stealing wheel trims  Stealing clothes from oot the bottom of ma baseball cap  Cultivating a gallus wee spikey fringe that sticks in the bad fire for all the above  Religiously attending confession on Sunday so ah dont born washing lines  Stealing clothes from jakeys.
 Telling *Beep* they will burn in the bad fire supported Sellik? How long have you came out  Since they started winning again  Lifetime  Since 1967  Since the new strip because they simply dont have our high moral standards How often do you we look like winning  When day release permits.
 Every Game  Every Home Game  Every game When its on in Dixons windae  When its on in the pub  see matches? How do you pay for ginger bottles  Sell the Big Issue  Giro  Provident  A big bag a use the additional family credit.
 Get ma sister pregnant again and your season ticket? Where were you when Celtic the best night of my life  Supporting St Mirren, but it was the best night of my life  No interest in football, but it was won the European Cup?
 Wasnt born, but it was the was the best Knight of my life  Has sex at the St Columba Club, he Chip Shop.  Robbing the best night of my life (Evidence on shoulder must see Sellick win?
What would you rather Irish League  Fights outside Bairds Bar  SPL  Premiership  Champions League  be provided) Do you own any retro style Eire tap  A Pogues T Shirt  A replica Sellick tap  A cheap as *Beep* Balaclava and a combat jacket.
 Lison Lions 1967 commemorative pyjamas  of the following?  Pope John Paul II on tour at into Sellick Boys Club? Have your kids managed to get dead keen to get into them  Yes  No, but the Club are Ballhouston Park 82 souvenir rosary beads.
In your own words please explain slip if necessary) (Continue on a separate betting our secure unit supporters club. Please state your main reason for joining the silent T in Celtic  Near Home  Near Barlinnie  Near the overwhelming them and us Irish mentality.
 Need to join a gang as part of employment with Glasgow City Council  To increase my chances of finding ma social worker  Near Carstairs (If in any doubt, just ask your carer, social worker, parole paranoid mind and hideously grotesque I, ___________O____________ , being of feeble His Holiness the Pope John Paul II;
Coupon do hereby declare my undying allegiance to officer, etc tae pit yer name in the wee boaxes) The Virgin Mary, Cardinal Winning (god rest his soul), St Patrick, Billy Connolly, The Irish Republic, Rod Stewart, Mother Theresa and the little Club into good repute through an of my I will not bring the bad name of Sellick Football practices, which maybe considered socially acceptable. Actions, nor will I indulge in any sisters of the poor, Bono fae U2, Gerry Adams, The Knights of St Columba and the chairman of Sellick Football Club.
I shall hate THEM and all things British with oor mob and will not seek to integrate with society as a whole in any way, shape or form. (Including lent) to uphold the longstanding Irish underclass traditions of Sellick Football Club in accordance with the rules and regulations of long, and b: i didn't get the scottish talk :/ I gave up have way becase a: the rest seemed to rabid fervour and endeavour at all times Hahahahah cool. thread they would actually be guttin themselves.
Man if some scots on here checked this classic... Thats a